Although divorce is a difficult time for both you and your spouse, witnessing the breakup of your family usually has the biggest and most lasting impact on your children. As your family transitions into a new chapter, it is important to be mindful of your children’s feelings. Here are 6 ways you can help them get through a divorce:
Respect their feelings
Let your children know that any emotion they express is completely valid. Encourage them to be honest and open about their feelings, even if it means seeing them angry or frustrated.
Give them reassurance
Guilt usually plays a significant role in divorces. Tell them how much you love them and reassure them that the divorce is not their fault. This helps eliminate any fear that they might be carrying.
Provide structure through routines
Children feel safer when they follow a stable routine. This familiar feeling helps give them security and comfort. For example, if you read them a book before bedtime, doing the same after divorce lets them know that nothing has changed.
Commit to your quality time together
Having their schedules divided between two households can be a tremendous change for children. Showing up on time and where it matters means you value their presence in your life just as much as you did before.
Do not talk badly about the other parent
Your kids are not supposed to feel like they have to choose sides. Be civil when you are out together as a family and avoid fighting over decisions that relate to them. Additionally, do not use your children as messengers and discuss matters directly with your ex-spouse.
Seek professional support
A therapist or counselor can help each family member process their emotions more effectively and transparently. These sessions can foster honest, unbiased discussions, encouraging everybody to move forward to this new phase of your family in a healthy way.
Healing is progress for everybody
Even when it is time to move on from your marriage, you both still want nothing but the best for your children. With ample time, dedication and support, your kids can smoothly transition into this new chapter feeling more confident and cherished by both of their parents.